There are some things people do not tell you about being a mother. And then there are the things they tell you over and over again . . .

I lost track of how many times other’s have told me that “it all goes so fast.” Sometimes I would just tune it out, because while you are in the thick of it–the diapers, the tears, tantrums, and bags under your eyes it’s easy to want it to go fast. I felt guilty for feeling these feelings, but they were there and so I faced them. I felt the glorious weight of two babies–one on each hip. It was a constant tip of the scales from high to low and low to high. Sleep deprivation, of course, having much to do with it.

But one day I caught the words my friend was saying….”The days are long, but the years are short.” Catchy, I thought. But soon enough I knew.

I know.

The diapers are gone. The kids are in school. And, now, I’d like to freeze time.

But it’s a slippery thing, time. It ticks and tocks and never stops–not even for sleep.

I want to freeze time, Liam Brave. You’ve just turned eight (I can hardly type e.i.g.h.t.) and I’m stumped on that one.

You’ve always been an old soul (I mean what kid is caught reading the paper in the back of the car on vacation? I think I might know one other person that could have been a kid like this). Your mind, compassion, empathy, and understanding always exceeding your years. But now, your legs are catching up. So quickly, that your pants can’t keep up, I might add.

I know we’ve got time. I mean you are in 2nd grade, right? But I’ve been here before. Two times to be exact. It’s hard to remember your sister in second grade and it seems like just yesterday that Lukie was in the same classroom you sit in today. Time is always on the move. And because it is….I like to freeze frame what I can. Freeze frame who you are at this moment in time. Because you will change. You will grow. You will not always like what you like now. You will not always say what you say or think what you think. But you will want to remember. And you will want to return. You will want to find the pattern of who you have always been. Let me help you with that.

+ You instantly pick up lyrics. You are our second little singer. I think Charlie Puth’s “Attention” just might be your favorite song. Or is it that Shawn Mendes one?
+ You actually enjoy reading, now. Two years ago it made you cry and now you ask to sneak my book light into your bed at night. Of course, I let you because–what could be better than reading a book in bed?
+ If anyone (but me) touches your food or even looks too closely at it, you say…”I’m not eating it!!!”
+ You break into an English accent at random times, like me. Ello, Panuchio. I’m still now sure where Panuchio came from.
+ I think Turkey meatloaf might be your new fave dinner? But it’s probably Spaghetti.
+ Current show: Thunderman’s
+ English tea, with milk, before bed is becoming a ritual.
+ Lino’s pizza makes you puke (I hope you grow out of this).
+ During the letter game you used words like “Distastic” which I can only assume means “not fantastic,” and “dislikeful.”
+ You love to play chess and taught me to play checkers (Crazy your 40-year-old mom didn’t know how to play but it was worth the wait for you to teach me).
+ You love going to the trampoline park and can now do a flip into the foam pit.
+ You like to read the Diary of a Wimpy Kid books and Roald Dahl too (Hallelujah). Reading The Twits together was a dream come true.
+ You caught a fly ball during a baseball game this summer.
+ You are obsessed with Steph Curry and the Warriors. You said you would like your name to be changed to Wardell (Steph Curry’s real name). This makes me giggle.
+ You understand. Sometimes with your eyes. Sometimes with your words. Always with your heart.

You are a most unique soul, Bravey. There is something so very special about you and I get to unwrap that gift every day.

I love you always,

Mom xo

___

more birthday posts here.

By Trina

four.  i’m not sure about four.  four is that year where munchkins turn to (little) men.  somewhere in the year of four, you go to bed one night a baby, and wake up the next morning a boy.  and, the thing is, you never really know which night that might be.  you, though, liam have always been somewhat of a munchkin and a man.  my old soul. words of wisdom, kindness and understanding, only known by those who have lived life, seem to float out with ease in a mini pitch.  while, i know your voice will change with age, i pray your tone never will.

+you’re favorite food is spaghetti and pepperoni pizza, besides chocolate, of course.
+you ask if everything has coconut in it (which you are very against).
+all you seem to talk about these days are four wheelers.
+you say the most hilarious things like”you just got owned like a dog dog on a bun with mustard.”
and you tell me, “i’ll marry you everyday, cause your my wife.” #liambravesays
+you make sure we never miss “best part + and worst part of the day” at dinnertime.  and, everyday your answer is :  “the best part of my day was going to gommy’s house” and if you haven’t been to her house, than the worst part of your day, obviously, is “i didn’t get to go to gommy’s house + ride 4 wheelers.”
+you’ve started growling like a cheetah, which actually sounds more like a snake hiss.  i’m not sure?  but, it is your favorite response when asked a question.
+you ask me if you can pray for me, if i’m having a hard day.
+you’re favorite show at the moment is peter rabbit (i love this)
+you’re very insistent on picking out your own clothes, more particular than most girls, and you always want to wear jeans and your tiger shirt.  or, anything that you think makes you look like a worker (as you say).
+you learned to jump off the diving board + swim without water wings this summer.
+you are slightly obsessed with duck dynasty + have some how picked up some sort of twang accent.  i’m puzzled.
+you love going to chicago.  i think you will be my little traveler.
+you think your the boss (you kind of are) and you have no problem speaking for our entire family (like when the fireman came to our house – burnt food – and you answered the door and proceeded to introduce the entire family to the fire-chief).
+this year you asked santa for shoes + a stuffed animal reindeer.
+you’re favorite book is iggy peck architect.

bravey, although you are sandwiched in the middle, i hope you know how much you stand out.  you are one of a kind.  a kind that oozes kindness and curiosity, which makes for the best personality.  you’re little arms uplift my tired ones and your little prayers help me to have big faith.  i hope you will grow to know that you can always count on my arms and prayers too.  lets always offer this to each other.

happy birthday, liam brave, age 4.

more birthday posts here.

By Trina

How is it you are 3?  Although, there are days, I could swear you are 63.  You are such an old soul Liam Brave.  A child’s heart happily coupled with an old soul, there could not be a more perfect being.  Although, I am the one that should be leading the way, dear one, I am certain that there are days that you are guiding my way.

+first things first in the morning and for you it is Peppa Pig
+ you are still trying to get ahold of the grownies coffee any chance you get
+ you always say, “mommy, you make me happy”  and my heart melts
+for lunch its peanut butter and jelly
+you are such a good little swimmer + love going to lessons each week
+this past summer was spent driving the John Deere and you are quite the driver
+every night at dinner you declare, “this is the best dinner I’ve ever had.”
+you just moved out of your crib + into the bunky beds (as you call them) with Luke
+when you grow up you are going to be a doctor and take care of us all
+we have a little song, “there once was a man named mr. poop, mr. poop, mr, poop…”
+you’re favorite book is The Gruffalo (and I like that one very much, too)
+you can sing every word to “A You’re Adorable” and I’m amazed each and every time
+to you an apple is an “un pomme”
+giraffe is still your favorite and I know he always will be
+one day I will take you to D’Ork (New York) with me + we will have the best of times

I know, certainly, that without you I’d be lost.  You are a package of perfect sent from heaven above.  I wonder if one day when you are older you will remember all of our little grown-up conversations.  If for some reason you should forget (which I doubt with that miraculous little memory of yours) then I will be there to tell you the stories and remind you of our days.  Of how, when I would be losing my cool, over the stupidest thing, you would grab my hand and say, “I love you mom.  It’s Ok, my mom.”  And suddenly, it was all OK.  It is all OK….because I have you.  Brave, when the day comes when things seem overwhelming, too much, upsetting, or just bleak, I will be be there, grabbing your hand and saying, “I love you, Liam.  It’s OK.”

Happy Birthday, Liam Brave, age 3.

By Trina

Happy Birthday my sweet Liam Brave.  You are pure joy.  Light in the darkness.  And laughter that never seems to end.  You have more personality than 10 grownies combined.

Oh how you love to talk.  Sometimes I’m amazed at all of the words [+ sentences] you know how to say.  And even more amazed at how you really understand what you are saying.

+You like coffee + help me order DECAF
+You can sing your ABC’s, only leaving out a few
+You watch Caillou in French [because I can only take so much in English] +Lately your favorite thing to do is the dishes
+You always want to go outside and you’ve managed to figure out the safety locks
+You look up to your El + L and you adore your baby Rocco
+You say I love you without us saying it first
+Your favorite stuffed animal is Giraffe and you can’t sleep without him
+You can put words to the music when I play Coldplay
+You love to give kisses
+Your favorite food is pizza + your pretty serious about your breakfast
+You can name all your stuffed animals + tell me who got them for you

You are all personality wrapped in a hug and sealed with a smile.  And . . . you are all mine.  I love you, dearly!

By Trina