little la la,

yesterday, in chicago, you told me your name isn’t la la.  i’m not sure if you rolled your eyes, but i rolled mine.  my jr. high self meeting yours.  no, your name is ella.  would have been eleanor.  beautiful fairy.  light.  grace.  and, as amy says, queen of the sea.  but, you are still ella bella ding dong, lolli-pop, ella grace with the pretty pretty face, and la la (as your little brothers started calling you – well, that and butthead).  you can’t take your names away – not even from yourself.  and, one day, you won’t want to.  you’ll laugh with your brothers, bigger then you, when they, in man voices, call you la la.  if you are lucky, like me, they will even have new names for you.  just as i have jumbo for jay.

it’s an interesting thing becoming ourselves.

 

and, it feels like you are on a fast track at your age.  but, the track never stops (if you let yourself be a lifelong learner) and sometimes circles back around again.  the little person you may be trying, at 12 , to outgrow is the one that will keep you, you, when you are 21, 62, or 93.  perhaps, all the birthday posts from here to 16 will sound a bit like a plea.  a plea, a reminder, wisdom if you welcome it . . . that, as you grow tall.  stay small.  not in your thinking, that is made to be big.  not in your love, that is to grow wide.  not in your confidence, that is to take root.  grow in all these things that will grow you.  but, in your spirit stay small.  small as a child.  for that is who you were created to be.  a child of God.  it is who you will always be, whether girl, mother or wife.  it is the only place you will find your true identity.  who you have always been and who you were always meant to be – at any stage and every age.  a daughter first and forever, darling.  a daughter.  a daughter to a Father who built and birthed an entire universe because He wanted a family.  sons and daughters.  you.  and, what a gift that the Father would trust us to care for his one of a kind, planned for, purposed, beloved daughter.  it is an honor to help you grow up into the child you will always be.

 

+you may wear more clothes out of my closet than your own
+eating at eataly for your birthday was your choice this year after you complained about me taking you there this year.
+you got the part of mermaid in the school play, but you’ve always been one to me and aunt amy
+you ask me to wear mascara everyday – as if i’m going to change my mind
+java chip frappuccino, pah-lease.
+you spend snow days making babysitting brochures
+”not for the life of me” bah da ba ba ba
+you just finished reading I Am Malala
+you still sing more then you talk
+you got a red floral kimono from billabong for your birthday
+you are a professional at selfies, mostly on my phone, which i can’t erase
+you are still afraid of feathers.  i know, it’s my fault.  remember you are part pigeon.
+your creativity is cool, my little minion.
+you are a professional at holding babies.  ella + baby hope = love.
+you are so good at keeping your room clean (haha….saying this in faith)
+you are cross-current trina 2.0