I’ve had too much.  We say this a lot.

I’ve had too much chocolate.  This world is just too much.

Too much beauty.  Too much pain.

Ironically, somewhere just trailing behind “too much,” lags “not enough.”

This blue and green world we are riding on is teetering off balance between too much and not enough.

Not enough food.  Not enough help.  Not enough resources.  Not enough good.

Too much waste.  Too much sugar.  Too much war.  Too much suffering.

Yet, it starts beyond the big world that is before us.  It’s starts, in us.

Either a

“She’s too much”

or a

“I’m not enough.”

 

 

I like to believe I live in the in between.  A middle dweller, play it safer, on some type of secure sidelines.  While some strive for too much, I’ve spent years trying not to offend with any kind of much only to find the other foot dipping into not enough.  Maybe we all never settle on one side entirely?

It a blind balance we work between everyday. A dance from side to side.  Too much makeup.  Not enough to quite cover up.  Too much work.  Not enough time.  Too many ideas.  Not enough implementation.  Too many good intentions.  Not enough follow through.  Too much stress.  Not enough rest.

Lately, my eyes have been fixed on this world being filled with too much.  Too much evil, to put it plain.  I avoid the news because I can’t watch too much of it.  But reports travel not just by network news reporters these days.  Stories reach you one way or another.  Even if you try to bury your head and ignore things, you can’t because they end up on Instagram and in conversation.   All of the too much has me focused on not enough.  Not enough good.  Too much bad.  Not enough change.  Too much pain.

Before, I know it, too much morphes into the most familiar too much  – – too much fear.  And, the real problem, I’m beginning to realize, is not “too much,” it’s “not enough”   Not enough love, to be exact.  But, the thing is . . . there is enough Love. I’m just not receiving or responding to it.  In fact, there isn’t just enough Love, there is too much of it.  God’s love is too much.  The best kind of too much.  To good to be true.  So much so, that at times it is hard to believe, accept, and receive.  Too much is the answer to “too much” and “not enough.”  TOO MUCH LOVE.  Not enough is only because we are not focusing on love, enough.  Perfect love (love without conditions) is the only remedy to too much fear and every other kind of not enough.  Today I’m letting too much Love in because it is more than enough.

P.S. As Mae West said, “too much of a good thing can be wonderful.”