I’ve had a really hard time focusing lately.  I don’t know if it’s because I’m in some sort of in between?  That is where I feel like I’m living- between “this” and possibly “that.”  Waiting for a green light to start a project I started a while ago.  Waiting for clarity and change in a few life areas.  I find that in this waiting space I have a tendency to procrastinate on other things.  And the things that I’m familiar with, like blogging, feel foreign at the moment.  This feeling is kind of familiar, actually.  It’s . . .

I’ve had a really hard time focusing lately. I don’t know if it’s because I’m in some sort of in between? That is where I feel like I’m living- between “this” and possibly “that.” Waiting for a green light to start a project I started a while ago. Waiting for clarity and change in a few life areas. I find that in this waiting space I have a tendency to procrastinate on other things. And the things that I’m familiar with, like blogging, feel foreign at the moment. This feeling is kind of familiar, actually. It’s . . .

that eight month pregnant feeling.  Do you remember this feeling? You’ve been growing.  Waiting.  Growing.  Waiting.   You feel done and good for nothing except for the baby you’ve been growing.  The one you can’t wait to meet.

Have you ever felt this way?  

I know there are things to be done in the waiting.  There is the everyday regular responsibilities you can’t neglect and then there is the preparing.  Duties and nesting.  Nesting and duties.  And thats where I keep getting stuck.  Where to place my focus?  In what proportions? I made a plan to split my focus, this morning.  Spend “this half” on the everyday and “the other half” on preparing.  Already, I’ve procrastinated and sabotaged my plan.

I’m sitting at my computer and not sure where to put my words.  Blog?  Instagram?  Journal?  Project?  Maybe I shouldn’t even be working on words at all today? I do need to go to the grocery store, pay bills, answer e-mails, along with a long list of other little things muddying my mind.  Eight months is uncomfortable.  I’m done.  I’m growing.  I’m waiting.

After failing at my plan of split focus I had to sit and close my eyes for a moment.  And for a moment I knew it could go two ways.  Get frustrated at myself for lack of focus and waste more time or simply ask for help.  It’s something God won’t let me get away from this year….. How very much He wants to help me.  To help you.  To help us.  Not just with the big decisions, hardships or struggles in life, but with the every day.  The every little thing.  He’s so interested in the details.  No thing is too small or too big for His help.

“Because of their faith in him, their daily portion will be a FATHER’S HELP…”
Ps. 37:4

Help is our DAILY portion.  And all we have to do is ask for it.  It’s nothing more than a talk with the Father.  “Where should I put my focus today, Dad?”  “How should I spend my time?”  “I’m stuck and need your advice, your wisdom.”  “What is the best way to handle this situation?”

When I stop and ask for help, the murky waters in my mind began to become clear and calm.  I don’t have to figure out tomorrow, next week, or next year.  I only have to live within in the boundaries of today.  And today, my portion includes a Father’s help.  Lucky us, tomorrow includes the same.

I’m finding my way in the delicate balance of preparation and waiting today, and remembering that between “this” and “that” God is at work.  I am not done, even when I feel that I am.  Today is a good day to keep growing, to prepare, and to welcome help.  Everyday I’ll welcome help – I think I’ll make that my focus.

By Trina